"I'm gonna go 100% natural through labor 'cause it's best for the bayyybeee, and no nurse or doctor is gonna even offer me pain meds, 'cause that's what's best for the bayyybeee, and I'm not gonna be monitored 'cause that's what's best for the bayyybeee, and my labor is gonna be painless because I've spent a lot of time online and there's a website that says if you don't call it pain, it's not pain and that's what I'm gonna do, 'cause that's what's best for the bayyybeee... but at 37 weeks, I'm gonna yank this fucker out whether I have to drink castor oil, perform unlicensed medically inappropriate accupressure, motor vehicle collisions, or an accidental trip down the stairs, 'cause it's really all about me. But I'll be 100% natural otherwise." *eats granola*
Who the hell are these people?
What is it about the last 6 weeks of pregnancy that turns otherwise thoughtful people with very good intention into irrational, self-absorbed, toxin-gulping maniacs?
For the first 34 weeks, you were counting every milligram of caffeine, microwaving your deli meat, flooding your body with enough water to drown most mammals, and measuring your ever-swelling abdomen centimeter by centimeter all the while documenting and sharing each detail...density, color, frequency...of your excrement on a message board because you were ALL about being pregnant.
But, now you've seen some early laborers result in successful births and you want out, and you want out NOW. Let's be clear, those babies are struggling. They'll probably and hopefully go on to live happy, successful, carefree lives-- but they've had a rough start regardless of how much their parents are glowing. And your jealousy doesn't justify your bullshit methods to yank that poor child from the comfortable growing place they've made for themselves over the last 7+ months just so you can post a few pictures on the interwebs, Mommy.
THIS is the time to not be selfish. This is what makes us parents. When things are tough, you sacrifice your own comfort and security for that of your child. It was easy to be pregnant even a month ago wasn't it?... saddle up, my friends. This is the hard part and there are lots more difficult moments to come.
I'm not saying that I won't be a whiny, tearful, complaining mess as we move forward through the last month or so just like everyone else-- but it does mean that I won't be seeking out the nearest ingestible yet survivable poison to end my discomfort early.
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6 comments:
Hi Echo, it's Meghan. I would never drink castor oil or do anything else that has been deemed unsafe, but just FYI: walking, sex, accupressure points, etc. are all safe and even recommended by many professionals to induce labor after 37 weeks. If your body isn't ready to go into labor, it won't- regardless of what you do. If they work it means you/the baby were ready. (Just ask all the moms who tried these things and had no success until 40 weeks.)So...just because someone is trying to self-induce (as long as they are considered full term) doesn't mean they are selfish. Most women do it knowing that it most likely won't start labor but that it can make their labor faster/easier when the time really arrives. A lot of those things help drop the baby down, efface/dilate the cervix so that when labor DOES start, it moves more quickly.
Oh, I'm aware of all you said.
The post revolves around people claiming that everything they've done and will do is 100% natural and completely in the interest of the baby, and then flipping the deal to relieve themselves of discomfort by inducing themselves (with or without doctor consent) at home but refusing and turning up their nose at others using the same effect through medicinal means.
When it comes down to it, it's about discomfort relief and I don't care what someone does with their body, but I don't wanna hear the Earth Goddess bullshit from these same people.
That said-- walking and sex are not included in what I'm talking about.
Another key point you made is the 37 weeks. The current medical standard seems to be 39 weeks for induction (if not 40, honestly). 37 weeks would still be considered early to induce.
Now-- all of THAT said-- as far as those home induction attempts go, none of them are gonna work if your body isn't ready anyway.
But, I just don't wanna hear the holier than thou crap when people are working their hardest to evict the kid for their own needs.
That's all.
P.S... I'm not opposed to induction-- whether medically supervised or otherwise.
I am, however, opposed to a total lack of self-awareness for the reasons behind behaviors.
Well I am one of the ones that is into doing it naturally, but I don't think I'm better than anyone else. I really don't care how other people choose to birth, as long as it's safe for mom and baby. I do plan on doing things to try to get labor going, but I also consider those natural since they include walking, sex, raspberry leaf tea (which doesn't actually induce labor, it just helps strengthen the uterus), and accupressure points. (Side note: the accupressure points were taught in our Bradley class by a licensed massage therapist who specializes in pregnancy and labor massage. She said that they are okay to do anytime after 38 weeks.) I won't be ingesting any "unnatural" substances nor will I be doing anything that could harm the baby. And yes, I realize that it is for my own comfort but I don't see anything wrong with helping things along when I am full term.
37 weeks is considered full term, but obviously it's best to wait as long as possible (although going too far past the due date can be just as bad as going too early). I won't be doing the accupressure point until 38-39 weeks, but I'll be doing a lot of walking and such once I hit 37 weeks.
OK, I'll explain to you why this post does not apply to you personally.
A) You've never lectured others on being natural.
B) You've never gone on ad nauseum about why your way is the best way.
C) This post isn't about people who refuse pain meds, it's about people who claim to be all crunchy and pure throughout the pregnancy until the end.
D) You're planning on using normal methods to assist labor that pretty much everyone uses.
E) You're not holier-than-thou about your choices.
F) You're not talking about induction until after the 38-39 week mark.
G) You're aware of your reasons.
Don't make me go into the 2nd third of the alphabet to tell you...
This post isn't about you. :-p
Okay, okay. Got it. I think I DO know who it's about. :-P
P.S. Love the bumper sticker post.
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