Sly Child

There's been some evidence that my husband and I might be jerks.

Ever since my mother-in-law texted my husband minutes after the birth of our daughter to tell him how she was disappointed in him for not being invited, they haven't been so close.

Or, maybe it all started when she wrote him a scathing email moments after returning home from our wedding about how she didn't feel showcased enough that day. Either way, it's safe to say their relationship has been rocky for the past year at least.

So, yesterday when we decided we would take Maya to see his aunt and grandmother, we both felt an overwhelming sense of obligation to invite his mother as well. We didn't want to do it, but we needed to devise a way that we could get credit for the invite without having to deal with all that messy "visiting" stuff.

Enter Sly Dial.

There is actually a gem of technology that allows you to bypass a voice conversation by sending you directly to the voicemail of a cell phone user. (And yes, there's an app for that.) This is evil genius at its most practical. Granted, it makes us slimeballs, but its genius nonetheless.

So, my husband dials 267-SLYDIAL and leaves a voicemail approximately 30 minutes before our arrival at his grandmother's house..."Hey Mom, just wanted you to know that we're going to be at Nan's house in about an hour or so and we were hoping you could come over and see us and Maya. Hopefully we'll see you there!"

The visit came and went...no call, no show.

On the way back, about 10 minutes into the ride home, my husband gets a call. I could only hear his side of the conversation but it went a little something like this:

"Oh, really? That's weird."
"Hmm, I guess it was probably around 3:30 when I called."
"Yeah, I don't know."
"It went right into voicemail so maybe you didn't have reception or something?"
"Strange. Wish you could've been there!"

And the Academy goes to...!

So, alright. You COULD make an argument that this makes us total liar sketchballs. On the other hand, you could also make an argument that SlyDial is the best tool for keeping the peace in a minefield of diplomatic booby traps.

We avoided a fight, she wasn't offended by the lack of invitation, no one got blood pressure headaches, Maya wasn't jostled around for someone else's entertainment, and everyone gets to blame Verizon for the whole thing. Everyone LOVES to blame Verizon!

Look, I'm willing to admit that this makes us jerks, but the best KIND of jerks. Diplomatic jerks, if you will. Good jerks.

All I am saying is...give peace a chance. SlyDial for your sanity. Be a good jerk. That's not their slogan or anything, but maybe it should be.