My List of Reasons Why Not

Obviously, lacking any common sense at all my mother-in-law has asked me the question. You know, THE question. His mother's distrust of me will soon transform to fearing for my mortal soul...or, rather, her granddaughter's, I'm sure.

Will you be baptizing the baby?

Of course, this came to us by email. My husband simply responded "no" with no further explanation. But there is an explanation. There are several explanations. There is a HUGE list of explanations why we will not be baptizing our child.

...and this is a small sampling of that list...

1. I'm Jewish, therefore, so is Maya.
2. My Judiasm is strictly cultural-- theologically, we are Agnostic.
3. Were we willing to baptize, you would need to be a member of a church...which we are not...because...see #1 & 2.
4. The entire concept of baptism is about committing yourself to God and a specific religion which is also a problem because... see #1-3.
5. Baptism requires "god parents" which means that she would find out that if something happened to us, my mother, not she, would be put in charge of Maya's well-being.
6. If we thought we KNEW there was a God, it'd still take a lot of convincing for us to believe that there were certain people on Earth that could throw some water on our kid and get her in good with Him.
7. We're not spending the money and energy to go through this charade to pretend for a family that hasn't even themselves been to church in at least 8 years.

...those are probably my least offensive ones.

But suffice it to say... WTF. Seriously, W...T...F.